Wildwood Restaurant Review: Portland has a Wildwood too

Wildwood Restaurant Review: Portland has a Wildwood too

I think the sun makes me lazy. That, or I am lazy. Sometimes when you offer the excuse for yourself, life just sounds better. Where am I going with this? Oh yea, it has been a month since my trip to Portland, and I still have a queue of pictures waiting. Just two more posts here and then it will all be over! Phew! Anyway so the reason I went to Portland was for a friend’s (Linda) wedding. Before the afternoon ceremony, my friends Gracathon (Grace + Jonathan, really it was that or Jonarace.) For lunch we went to Wildwood (not the same as the Wildwood in New York) because I wanted regional cuisine that happened to be open for lunch on a Saturday… actually that is much more difficult than you would imagine…

The appetizers were spot on for the most part. The beet soup was cold and refreshing. There was something acidic in it that heightened the flavor. I could not really pinpoint what it was. The steamed mussels were fantastic. Fresh and delicious, they really set the tone for the rest of the enjoyable meal.

I saw fried oysters on the menu and just had to order it. And I do this thing where it is like, selective blindness. I see an item that looks AWESOME, and overlook the other part. And the other part was not fried. Not oystery. It was a salad. Ok, the salad was nice, fresh, tasty, good for my body, but I felt like my lack of reading prowess failed me. Salad. Pssh. Vegetables!?! Dust them with cheetos powder or something. Anyway… The oysters were dusted with cornmeal before they were deep fried, and they were sensational. You do not get the intricacies of raw oysters, but a fried oyster is a thing of beauty… crunchy exterior with a soft luscious center. Mmm…

Our entries included a grilled guinea fowl, lamb ragu, salmon cake, and pork meat ball calzone. All of the entrees were tasty, and the one that stood out the most to me was the calzone. Inside the calzone were pork meatballs, chedder, pesto, and POTATOES! Who puts potatoes in calzones?! They totally hit the spot though.

The one odd note about the meal came near the end. Jack said the sauce for his salmon cake was weird and he did not touch it. We looked at its lumpy texture and how the oil separated from the solids… and determined that it was supposed to be a hollandaise. It looked like a hollandaise that belonged in the sewers or something though. We asked the server about it when he came to clear the plat. He told us he mentioned it to the kitchen, but they thought it tasted fine therefore it was okay that it looked like lumpy crab doo doo. In the words of Mark Jackson, “Wildwood, you’re better than that!”

So after we ate, we went to the wedding and also to the reception. During the reception, Linda came over to Jonathan and me to say hello. She also tricked Jonathan into holding the camcorder before the speeches were to start. Being the good guy that he is, Jonathan was up to the task.

For Linda’s wedding, all the groomsmen and bridesmaids spoke. And the last groomsman was the groom’s youngest brother. The young dude went up there to talk about how his older brother taught him to play violin. He mentioned how it was always really effective when his older brother carried a stick and threatened to beat him. Then in good fashion he joked and hoped that his older brother would not beat his future kids.

Almost instinctively I leaned into the camcorder and whispered really loud,”Let’s hope he doesn’t beat his wife either!” And Jon chimed in also, “Yea let’s hope he doesn’t beat his wife. Tehehe.”

And I might have stuck the ‘tehehe’ part in there on my own, but it was clear that neither of us thought Linda would be hit violently. We were talking about the other kind. What kind you ask?! Hey, this is PG-13. Relax folks. I just hope Linda’s parents do not figure out our voices as they listen to the video…