Averageness and breakfast sandwich at shake shack
When I was in high school and the first few years of college, the dominant instant messaging system in the U.S. was called AIM, which stood for AOL Instant Messenger. If you have no goddamn clue what AOL means, I hate you. Stop being so hip. But one of the features of AIM was that it was an extension off of regular AOL because the chat feature was actually what was most popular about it. Anyway, AIM had this thing where you could post a tiny text 'profile' or whatever you want like quotes or whatever. And I would always think I was this great emo (before emo was a word, even though now it's not anymore) shit and wrote my own un-pithy quotes about life. As a thirty-something now, the only un-pithy thing that I really want to write on my 'profile', which is...